My life.....currently

Recently, all my life consists of is going to class to pass the time, logging into my amazon account about 8 times a day, google email 10times a day, constantly listening to pandora radio, checking my bank account about 2 times a day and sleeping. How boring! I am actually looking forward to work this weekend. Thats pathetic! Ooh well, hopefully I will be super busy this summer and next semester. Passing time really sucks!

Funny how that works huh?

I was very depressed this morning, wanted to drop out of school, join the navy, and who knows what else I would have done drastically. I looked at apartments with Eric, returned some stuff at the outlets, ate at Subway in Grove City, and asked a girl out and she said yes. I feel good right now and wonder how feelings can change so drastically. I am a minimalist and I like it that way.

Future.....

What is the problem????? College is NOT working for me!!!!! There is ONLY one thing I am sure that I want from my life, as of right now, and that is to travel the world. Possibly the best way to achieve this is to join the Navy. What is holding me back? Who is holding me back? My parents? Myself? God? How do I know if it will work out? It is a big commitment. The only way to find out is to just do it!

Friends...What are they for?

I truly believe friends serve very little purpose in my life. I have many acquaintances, but no real friends that I talk to every day and share personal stuff with. Yes, this can get lonely at times, but I find that friends can manipulate your motives and beliefs and turn you into something that your not. It is good to have acquaintances so you can build upon your social skills, but these relationships should stay very shallow.

Loser or Underachiever?

I have recently ran into a few people that made me look at my life and ask the question....Am I a loser or an underachiever? Last night I went out with an old friend to Panera Bread to catch up and talk about the good 'ole days. This beautiful young woman has achieved a lot academically. It made me re-evaluate my life. I thought I was on the right track, back in school, living on my own, working as an optician. We graduated high school the same year and she is almost finished with grad school. I on the other hand have switched schools 4 times, have 3 years to go for undergrad and my program is weak (physical education). To make things even worse, tonight I met someone that goes to Pitt (a school I did go to) and poked fun at the school I am currently in (Slippery Rock is a small town school in the rural parts north of Pittsburgh). Not only that, he could speak 4 languages, was extremely rich and intelligent. I try not to compare myself to others, but it can be hard sometimes especially since I am already feeling down on myself from last night. I sit at home a lot, rarely converse with others, and do very little outside of class. In other words I am a loser, but I have also underachieved in my own eyes and in the eyes of my parents I'm sure. How depressing to be both a loser AND an underachiever!